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-   -   who wants to help me out? (http://www.zefrank.com/bulletin_new/showthread.php?t=2376)

AlchemY 07-29-2003 01:22 AM

who wants to help me out?
Try that and if yer worth it, come and join the team. If not, be a subscriber soon. The Weekly Crap will be started up in two weeks!!


xerocs 07-29-2003 08:12 AM

Where do I begin? "Begin at the beginning and go on till you come to the end; then stop".
Lewis Carroll's Adventures of Alice.

The beginning:
I have an Associates in Applied Science and I am currently working on my Bachelors in Information Technology. I have a dead-end job that I show up for daily. I am the Non-Commissioned Officer in Charge of Munitions Mobility at Aviano Air Base, Italy. What that means is, I am over-worked, under-paid and stressed beyond the limits of any intelligent human being. I have a dead-end relationship with a Croatian girl who speaks in sentence fragments and like every other 22 year old on this planet, she is on a soul searching mission to "find herself". My freshman year of college I dreamed of being a writer and tried to load my classes down with a healthy dose of english, literature and journalism. As a 26 year old soldier, I still dream of being a writer. I have never had anything published but I have had many submissions. I don't know if that means I am a bad writer or if other editors are just jealous and want a little job security. I hate when the man keeps me down.
The end:
The money isn't really important to me in so much as the title. Say it out loud and listen to the ring this has, Patrick E. Mason, Freelance Web Journalist. Maybe an Esquire would make it sound better? Seriously I would love the opportunity to work for your web syndicate. I have CCed this application to all of the loyal readers I already have of my daily crap. I call them loyal because they are forced to suffer through two or three e-mails daily in which I update them on the stupidest current events possible; like the woman who beat her boyfriend to death with her shoe in New York a few weeks ago. Think of the publicity you could have as I have seen some of my e-mails make it around the world an back in half a day. I hope that maybe some of them will write you and testify, that would save you the time of asking for references. Also, someday, when I actually get my shit together and get a job that doesn't involve national security, I would like to have at least one credible reference for the dream job that seems unattainable. Plus, I think chicks would dig a guy with the title Freelance Journalist. I have attached an recent rambling that I sent to Stuff Magazine for publication. I don't know that they will publish it, but I did attach a read receipt and at least know that they read it and laughed before putting it in file 13. As far as specialization goes, what would you be interested in? I am on location in Italy, I work for the US government (see dead-end job), I play an extensive amount of video games (see dead-end relationship) and I have no qualms doing product reviews. I can meet deadlines and work hard all I need is the forum and the opportunity.

Patrick E. Mason, SSgt, USAF
NCOIC Munitions Mobility

Frieda 07-29-2003 08:48 AM

i wanna help too. i'm into photography and research. writing is more difficult, because english isn't my first language. but you already know that. :D anyway, i'd like to see some examples of what you are planning to do, do you have anything online?

if you don't want to put any links up here, either pm me or add me to yahoo: freaky_pirate

Yes 07-29-2003 12:19 PM

Will you or are you allowed to employ minors?

agentsmith 07-29-2003 01:15 PM


Originally posted by Yes
Will you or are you allowed to employ minors?

same question here. i would be very interested in one of your other available jobs you mentioned.

AlchemY 07-29-2003 02:45 PM

Send an email to:
And yes, I would hire minors, since they are the new breed of writers out there. Remember, it wont be a much paying job at first, we must make this grow as a team. And then it will pay off.
nycwriters: I cleaned it up as mentioned.
agentsmith: mail me
frieda: can you show me your stuff (i always wanted to ask that :p)
xerocs: you are hired. mail me and i will set you up with a password and username for the magazine.
Yes: email me.

Voila, I think that answers all the posts :)

AlchemY 07-29-2003 03:00 PM

I just bought the URL and serverspace, so now I have to design the outlooks of the magazine. Until that happy moment arrives I just can point you to my own website, which is mentioned in my signature. You can find enough of my works there and all of them contain my resume.


trisherina 07-29-2003 11:41 PM


Hell, I'd hire you. You're the most honest person I've heard from all day.

AlchemY 07-30-2003 01:33 AM

He is, isnt he? And talented, too.

xerocs 07-30-2003 08:00 AM

Thank you, thank you....
Now everyone stop before my head gets to big.... Just promise you will log on at least daily to read my articles :)

Frieda 07-30-2003 08:21 AM


i don't have anything online right now except for the stuff that's in the arts/photography thread.. i don't think i have time to put stuff up until next week (new apartment, no internet connection there YET) but i'll try to log on tonight and see what's already on the net.

agentsmith 07-30-2003 12:12 PM

i do reviews.

they arent on the compy, but if you are interested i will type them and send them to you.

Yes 07-30-2003 12:39 PM

Okay, AlchemY, I've emailed you. :)

malina 07-30-2003 12:42 PM

i don't want to help :D

xerocs 08-03-2003 10:44 AM

I don't knowif you will checkback here butI can't check my work e-mail on the weekends...

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