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-   -   american sentences (http://www.zefrank.com/bulletin_new/showthread.php?t=9696)

zero 07-10-2006 09:17 AM

american sentences
quote=paul nelson
  • american sentences as a poetic form was allen ginsberg's effort to make american the haiku. if haiku is seventeen syllables going down in japanese text, he would make american sentences seventeen syllables going across, linear, like just about everything else in america

  • american sentences are one line, 17 syllable sentences

  • american sentences work best when there is an aha! moment and when the modifier comes in the last word, or even last syllable:

  • examples:

    four skinheads stand in the streetlight rain chatting under an umbrella.
    october 4, 1987

    outside ritzy pine street shops, two legless men among those seeking change.
    August 8, 1990

    ................................allen ginsberg

  • post as many/few words as you want as long as sentence=17syllables

  • write a "go it alone" entire sentence OR start/finish "communal" sentences - just complete any "communal" sentence before posting a "go it alone" sentence

to begin:

station café


12"razormix 07-10-2006 09:31 AM

station café she sits wonders and stares at white walls with no meaning

Marcus Bales 07-10-2006 09:34 AM

The first time Yossarian saw the chaplain he fell madly in love.

zero 07-10-2006 11:34 AM

he was bleeding, the second man

Marcus Bales 07-10-2006 12:14 PM

It was a bright cold day in April, and the clocks were striking thirteen.

trisherina 07-10-2006 12:54 PM

he was bleeding, the second man she lost her heart to that August day.

trisherina 07-10-2006 03:30 PM

Pavement reflects grey

Marcus Bales 07-10-2006 03:33 PM

I thought all the sentences had to be seventeen syllables long.

zero 07-10-2006 03:46 PM

pavements reflect grey, polkadotted with last saturday's confetti.

Ze Frank 07-10-2006 07:54 PM

Twenty thousand feet in the sky

ambo 07-10-2006 09:51 PM

Twenty thousand feet in the sky, her thoughts float out onto bloated clouds.

Marcus Bales 07-11-2006 08:35 AM

The man in black fled across the desert, and the gunslinger followed.

trisherina 07-11-2006 11:45 AM

If I am out of my mind, it's all right with me, thought Moses Herzog.

Marcus Bales 07-11-2006 08:05 PM

He was born with a gift of laughter and a sense that the world was mad.

trisherina 07-11-2006 08:10 PM

They scrubbed for all they were worth but the stain

Marcus Bales 07-11-2006 10:47 PM

"They made a silly mistake, though," the Professor of History said.

Ze Frank 07-12-2006 02:29 AM

They scrubbed for all they were worth but the stain on the soul could not be cleansed.

zero 07-12-2006 04:09 AM

nine bars, yet such a small town

trisherina 07-12-2006 11:44 AM

nine bars, yet such a small town holds all that is large in a tippler's heart.

magdalen 07-12-2006 12:01 PM

screaming kids and howling puppies; I think the weather is changing fast :mad:

Marcus Bales 07-12-2006 08:54 PM

There was a boy called Eustace Clarence Scrubb, and he almost deserved it.

dddrum 07-12-2006 09:24 PM

Cold corner, bad neighborhood, scary thought: how late do the buses run?

Coffee 07-12-2006 10:18 PM

If I had ten bucks I'd buy you a beer, make it ten million...sod off.

12"razormix 07-13-2006 06:41 AM

a shiny doorknob

zero 07-13-2006 08:23 AM

a shiny doorknob - touch it and know i'm your REGIONAL MANAGER

12"razormix 07-13-2006 08:50 AM

when you smile you make my world resolve and you take over my pai-hayne

Marcus Bales 07-13-2006 10:16 AM

'Marley was dead, to begin with, there is no doubt whatever about that.

magdalen 07-13-2006 12:14 PM

the big man upstairs drives me crazy with Testament and Megadeath :mad:

rapscalious rob 07-13-2006 05:08 PM

fingers tightening around cold steel bars, jaws clenched, a high whine; bus stops

Ze Frank 07-13-2006 09:42 PM

Bart knew he needed something to unlock the steel grated door with.

zero 07-14-2006 05:15 AM

then the sun's light

lapietra 07-14-2006 03:40 PM

then the sun's light reflected from the windshield, conspiring to blind me

Marcus Bales 07-14-2006 04:35 PM

The pebbled glass door is lettered in flaked black paint: "Phillip Marlowe”

trisherina 07-14-2006 04:40 PM

Bearing a bowl of lather on which a mirror and razor lay crossed.

Marcus Bales 07-14-2006 04:55 PM

Not so long ago, a monster came to the small town of Castle Rock.

Coffee 07-14-2006 07:03 PM

Heaving to and fro the broaching seas did help throw the boxed lunch over.

Marcus Bales 07-14-2006 08:45 PM

It is spring, a moonless night in the small town, starless, and bible-black.

zero 07-15-2006 05:59 AM

of course the bather testing the sea like a ballerina is you

Marcus Bales 07-15-2006 08:24 AM

I wasn't doing any work that day, just catching up on my foot-dangling.

zero 07-15-2006 10:45 AM

pale blue eyes, belfast accent, brow furrowed genealogically.

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