communal limericks
 

Basic rules are like those for the communal haiku thread -- each person adds a line.

Let's keep 'em clean folks! But with lots of good word play, because we all know that good word play is excellent foreplay!

Here we go...


There was a short-tempered teacher named Fred

1. There was a short-tempered teacher named Fred.

2. Who burst in the classroom and said.

1. There was a short-tempered teacher named Fred.

2. Who burst in the classroom and said.

3. I'm so sorry i'm late.

1. There was a short-tempered teacher named Fred.

2. Who burst in the classroom and said.

3. I'm so sorry i'm late.

4. But I had a date.

1. There was a short-tempered teacher named Fred.

2. Who burst in the classroom and said.

3. I'm so sorry i'm late.

4. But I had a date.

5. She stood me up, thus made me see RED.

1. A daring web-master called Ze

1. A daring web-master called Ze
2. Was said to live most dangerously

1. A daring web-master called Ze
2. Was said to live most dangerously
3. His antics and spills

1. A daring web-master called Ze
2. Was said to live most dangerously
3. His antics and spills
4. Gave our employers the chills

1. A daring web-master called Ze
2. Was said to live most dangerously
3. His antics and spills
4. Gave our employers the chills
5. and frightened the life out of me.

1. A willingly obstinate goose

1. A willingly obstinate goose
2. Was in disagreement with a moose

1. A willingly obstinate goose
2. Was in disagreement with a moose
3. "Who says I am foul?"

1. A willingly obstinate goose
2. Was in disagreement with a moose
3. "Who says I am foul?"
4. "Was it that cowardly owl?!?"

1. A willingly obstinate goose
2. Was in disagreement with a moose
3. "Who says I am foul?"
4. "Was it that cowardly owl?!?"
5. Said the moose, "Kindly kiss my caboose."

There was a young man called Bob..

1. There was a young man called Bob..
2. Who had gambling debts to the mob

1. There was a young man called Bob..
2. Who had gambling debts to the mob
3. They weren't very happy

1. There was a young man called Bob..
2. Who had gambling debts to the mob
3. They weren't very happy
4. So they blew his knee-cappies

1. There was a young man called Bob..
2. Who had gambling debts to the mob
3. They weren't very happy
4. So they blew his knee-cappies
5. And now he can't swim: he just bobs

There once was a lady from Brooklyn

1. There once was a lady from Brooklyn
2. Who failed her home ec. class in cookin'

1. There once was a lady from Brooklyn
2. Who failed her home ec. class in cookin'
3. So TV dinners she made

1. There once was a lady from Brooklyn
2. Who failed her home ec. class in cookin'
3. So TV dinners she made
4. and served them to her husband, Slade.

1. There once was a lady from Brooklyn
2. Who failed her home ec. class in cookin'
3. So TV dinners she made
4. and served them to her husband, Slade.
5. then she, to the hospital, took him.

(gotta do it)

1. There once was a girl from Nantucket

1. There once was a girl from Nantucket
2. whose cooter resembled a bucket

(you started it...)

1. There once was a girl from Nantucket
2. whose cooter resembled a bucket
3. As she laid on the floor

1. There once was a girl from Nantucket
2. whose cooter resembled a bucket
3. As she laid on the floor
4. and begged me for more

1. There once was a girl from Nantucket
2. whose cooter resembled a bucket
3. As she laid on the floor
4. and begged me for more
5. I gave her some corn and she shucked it

(ak! i'm almost sorry i started it!)

1. Young Jimmy had a dilemma

1. Young Jimmy had a dilemma
2. He lost his pink ferret named Emma,

1. Young Jimmy had a dilemma
2. He lost his pink ferret named Emma,
3. He went to the street

1. Young Jimmy had a dilemma
2. He lost his pink ferret named Emma,
3. He went to the street
4. And stood tapping his feet

1. Young Jimmy had a dilemma
2. He lost his pink ferret named Emma,
3. He went to the street
4. And stood tapping his feet
5. Then decided to go get an enima

*Ducks and runs away*

Why pay a buck for a flower?

1. why pay a buck for a flower
2. When it is cheaper to just take a shower

1. why pay a buck for a flower
2. When it is cheaper to just take a shower
3. A flower masks odor

1. why pay a buck for a flower
2. When it is cheaper to just take a shower
3. A flower masks odor
4. which tends to just smolder

1. why pay a buck for a flower
2. When it is cheaper to just take a shower
3. A flower masks odor
4. which tends to just smolder
5. and withers and dies in an hour