Letters that get me through the day.
 

Okay, this is where we write letters to whatever/whomever we feel like. I'll go first so you can do by example. Feel free to be as cheesy or shallow as you like.

Dearest daddy,
Next time we get pizza from Papa Murphy's, please don't burn it. You ruined my pineapple pizza. I almost cried. Okay, not really, but you get how terribly sad that made me. Love ya.
Bacco

David Gray,
Meet me on the other side.
A Stranger.

Albertson's Cashier Boy,
I think I just stepped in a puddle of love and got you all over me.
*sigh*

Dear laundry,
Do yourself.
Beck.

MasterofNone,
You write good. I'm glad you write good with me.
Beck.

Dear My Job,
Please, either give me more hours, health insurance, and better pay, or fire me so I can collect unemployment. Yousuckdotcom!
*yarr*

*tag* you're it!

Dear Lord,
Please help the Redskins get to the playoffs. Cause, at this point, only you can make it happen.
And, if you have the time, please arrange it so that Gwen Stefani should fall madly in love with me.

MoN

GO CHARGERS!!!
 

I went to the game today, what a great game!!! Chargers won off a field goal in overtime, I really hope that they make it to the super bowl, especially since the super bowl will be in Diego baby!!!!!!

Dear Clients,
Early payment of invoices in the month of December will make you eligable to win auto fellatio lesson from a 'ze monkey of your choice.

Dear Creditors
In a new tradition of good cheer, for the month of December, all of your employees can have the month off.

Dear Lord,
On that Gwen Stefani thing, Renee Zelwigger would be okay too...

Hugz
MoN

Dearest Jeff Corwin,
Will you marry me? Please? I'm nice! And I want you for Christmas!
Heart,
Angie

Dear Lord,
On that Gwen Stefani, or Renee Zelwigger thing, forget them and make it JLo... word is she's got plenty of crack and you know how much I like the rock babeee

peaceout
MoN

You would think being a magic mushroom and all you'd have enough of it winding through your system....

Dear sanity clause,
Money to pay off the bandits. Multiple plane tickets to see friends and family. A nice guy who treats me decently, has a brain and likes to cook. And no auto fellatio sessions with any of mushroom's clients.

thanks,
~a

Dear Santa,

I hate you, lose my number.

signed,
your bitch

Yes Virgina, there is a sanity clause. Just sign on the bottom line...
 

hahahaa!! It's a great thing- seeing an image of Shirely Temple next to that post....

Bless you hun!

Santa baby,
The impossible. I want the impossible this Christmas.
Bacco

I have one, he just moved in yesterday...YIKES! *slurp*

Eye candy, yay! Is he gay? (prrrrrobably)

Dear Tennessee,

please send your mountains and scenery to Louisiana so I have something other than my alcohol bottles to look at

and while you're at it, after you send the mountains and scenery, feel free to implode (but let neko get out first)

-good ol' rockytop

To my new assistant:

yes, i'm sick. duh.

my trip was fine, stop asking me.

yes, i got a haircut. i lied when i said 'no' to shut you up.

i know my shirt kicks ass, stop telling me how good i look, you creep me out.

thanks for the shot glass, you very nice, naive, freaky crack-whore.

please don't cry when i fire you this week.

-st.