From now on I will not be thwarted

From now on I will not be thwarted
from declaring all ill-will aborted

From now on I will not be thwarted
from declaring all ill-will aborted
You will all learn to smile

From now on I will not be thwarted
from declaring all ill-will aborted
You will all learn to smile
Without deceit or guile

From now on I will not be thwarted
from declaring all ill-will aborted
You will all learn to smile
Without deceit or guile
And if caught then you will be reported

My New Year's resolution is made

My New Year's resolution is made
this next year i'll wear only jade

My New Year's resolution is made
this next year i'll wear only jade
From the tips of my toes
To the drips of my nose

My New Year's resolution is made
this next year I will wear only jade
From the tips of my toes
To the drips of my nose
it's from nephrite I shan't be afraid

In the back of my office a plum

In the back of my office a plum
position for quick naps and some

In the back of my office a plum
position for quick naps and some
Lewd but choice extracr'ic'lrs

In the back of my office a plum
position for quick naps and some
Lewd but [i]choice[i] extracr'ic'lrs
for those not partic'l'r

In the back of my office a plum
Position for quick naps and some
Lewd but choice extracr'ic'lrs
For those not partic'l'r
Invar'ia'bly reeks of pond scum

In a quite opportune piece of luck