these also cracked me up:

"I am making a huge poster sign that says " John Kerry's hair is not real" And I am bringing it down there for the rally."


and


"I was a alcohol soaked Kidney (with arms). Very cool."

this made me laugh too:

"So we watch a movie and have a frozen pizza, drinking beers. Then, he gives me 40 bucks and says last time he was here he ordered pay-per-view (HOW F-ING RUDE!) and I am like - HOW MANY DID YOU ORDER?"

he's lying. he must've deleted it. i said "**** and ***********" and then hung up

so it was you??

did you also order the pay per view

CURSES!!!

nope

"visual stuff" just isn't my thing

I just realized that it is only 6:30 p.m. here. Wow the time change really threw me off. Oh wait I have been up since 4:00 a.m, maybe that is it. Regardless, it has been a long day and I am already wanting to go to bed. Ha, I am such a old fart.

It says in the Bible that "God made man in his own image" and I expect Bush looks in the mirror from time-to-time and talks to himself.

Miss Rat, having turned 7 in August and perhaps imitating behaviours seen in her parents (ya think?) decided to check out the Neopets message boards yesterday. I copied and pasted one of her first messages, on the topic of "What Neopet should I draw?":

How about an Aisha? I tried to draw one by just following the instructions and it turned out pretty good! A Harris is a good petpet to draw. Again, just follow the instructions and you have a perfect Harris! If you are just beginning to draw neopets and petpets,this is the neopet and petpet to draw. If you have been drawing neopets for a long time, It's also lots of fun!

This must be why a fellow I know looks in the mirror and groans "Ohhhh, Jesus Christ!"

One restless night, George Bush is wandering the halls of the White House, seeking guidance and inspiration.

He comes upon the portrait of George Washington and asks, "Mr.
Washington, how can I best serve the country?" Washington replies, "Always tell the truth." Bush thinks to himself, that's a good idea, but he's not sure that's everything he needs to know.

Bush continues until he comes to the portrait of Thomas Jefferson. He stands before the portrait and asks, "You tell me Tom, how do you think I can best serve the country?" Jefferson responds, "Always follow the Constitution." Bush thinks, that's good too, but he still needs further guidance.

Bush continues until he finally comes to the portrait of Abraham
Lincoln. He asks, "What about you Abe, what do you think I could do that would be best for the country?"

Lincoln thinks about it for a moment, then responds, "Go see a play."

my dad's willie nelson impression....wow. interesting to say the least. :p

I thought willie nelson was a wrestling hold......

that is a half nelson :rolleyes: everyone knows that...

Not a nelson on your willy then ?

you might not be too happy if you got your willie in a nelson...