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-   -   Post something that made you laugh today. (http://www.zefrank.com/bulletin_new/showthread.php?t=4329)

drivinmissdaisy 12-13-2004 11:07 PM

Quote:

originally posted by rmr

actual conversation

fool: kentucky's in wisconsin, right?

me: yes, it is.
This was the first thing that made me laugh today. Except a picture that some guy would never let me show ya'll.

madasacutsnake 12-13-2004 11:33 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by bealeblues
one word: holyfvckingshit.....

we now have the christmas party pictures back. i'm in about 12 shots but i have no memory of ANY of them being taken.

none. not a good sign.

there's one shot i'm going to post of me dancing that also shows a video camera documenting the whole thing. i'm calling in sick the day that they show the video at the office.... judging by the pictures, i might even resign.


sparticle 12-14-2004 04:53 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by rmr
actual conversation

fool: kentucky's in wisconsin, right?

me: yes, it is.

That IS funny. Especially the "yes, it is".

I told my husband this fall during the Red Sox-Yankees playoff series that due to the large Hispanic population of New York, by law all their locally produced baseball broadcasts had to be in Spanish. Since we aren't exactly Yankees fans here, he had no frame of reference. Since I understand a little Spanish, I "translated" for him.

(I actually know baseball, not Spanish -- for all I know, half the time the announcer could have been talking about his own days in the minors in the Dominican Republic. But they'd show Pedro, and I'd say, "He says Pedro Martinez throws a psychological game. He says it's both his weakness and his strength. He says for a guy his size he has surprising power. Oh, look -- infield fly rule on that one. He says it would have been a foul ball with just another inch or so....")

When my husband found out the game was in Spanish because I had our cable receiver set to the Spanish-language option, he was less than amused with me. But that was okay as I was amused enough for both of us.

Maybe next week I will tell him Kentucky is in Wisconsin. It HAS to be. I saw it on the Internet.

melissa 12-14-2004 04:57 AM

Sparticle, you should give lessons. I admire your creativity.

drivinmissdaisy 12-14-2004 05:03 AM

Quote:

I told my husband this fall during the Red Sox-Yankees playoff series that due to the large Hispanic population of New York, by law all their locally produced baseball broadcasts had to be in Spanish. Since we aren't exactly Yankees fans here, he had no frame of reference. Since I understand a little Spanish, I "translated" for him.
That is funny, and totally something that I would believe.

I am trying to learn spanish, I think that it is a beautiful language.

sparticle 12-14-2004 05:31 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by melissa
Sparticle, you should give lessons. I admire your creativity.
Thank you. If I ever give lessons, I will not charge. Just knowing that everyone else's husband/significant other is climbing the walls too will be thanks enough. :cool:

zenbabe 12-14-2004 05:38 AM

http://www.laserp.com/fun_stuff/star_schmucks.htm

sparticle 12-14-2004 05:40 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by drivinmissdaisy
That is funny, and totally something that I would believe.

I am trying to learn spanish, I think that it is a beautiful language.

Spanish is indeed a beautiful language.

The funny thing is that if anyone else told Mr. Spart such an outrageous falsehood, he would say, "Get out of here. There's no way." And yet he knows that about half of what I tell him is just pure nonsense, designed to confound, annoy and pester him.

My husband, it is often remarked by friends and foes alike, is going to ascend bodily into Heaven when his time comes. Believe me, he will have earned every star in his crown. :cool:

Hermione 12-14-2004 05:46 AM

I learned Spanish for four years. I spoke it pretty well. I suck now. I do watch novelas now and then to brush up.

trisherina 12-15-2004 06:34 AM

"There's still a lot of Queens in George Tennant."

-- GW Bush, as quoted on The Daily Show

Zaftig 12-15-2004 06:38 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by zenbabe
http://www.laserp.com/fun_stuff/star_schmucks.htm
"fvcking tricky"

HAHAHHAAAA! I love that!

Audreyvgs 12-15-2004 12:42 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by JesusTitties


Da1&only 12-15-2004 02:52 PM

1 Attachment(s)
ha ha

priceyfatprude 12-15-2004 11:04 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by dinzdale
He's like a confederate Johnny Cochran isnt he?

More like Johnny Cockring ......:rolleyes:


drivinmissdaisy 12-16-2004 12:14 AM

A blonde called her bofriend and said, "Please come over here and help me. I have a killer jugsaw puzzle, and I can't figure out how to get it started."

Her boyfriend asked, "What is that supposed to be when it's finished?"

The blonde said, "According to the picture on the box, it's a tiger."

Her boyfriend decided to go over and help with the puzzle. She let him in and showed him where she had the puzzle spread all over the table. He studied the pieces for a moment, then looked at the box, then turned to her and said, "First of all, no matter what we do, we're not going to be able to the assemble these pieces into anything resembling a tiger." He took her hand and said, "Second, I want you to relax. Let's have a nice cup of hot chocolate and then..........", he signed, ........"Let's put all these frosted flakes back in the box."

Frieda 12-16-2004 12:23 AM

http://www.officeolympics.net/

Clytie 12-16-2004 08:56 PM

looking for a great gift this holiday?

http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll...542581788&rd=1

Zaftig 12-16-2004 11:16 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by madasacutsnake
Ha. Lala has pickle toes.

madasacutsnake 12-16-2004 11:24 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Clytie
looking for a great gift this holiday?

http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll...542581788&rd=1

Check out the high bidder ID.

Zaftig 12-16-2004 11:26 PM

You have GOT to be Shittin' me! HAHHAHAAA! Np pun intended! hahahha! If the people that received her cookies only new those aren't chocolate chips and the brownies have a 'secret' ingredient!! HAHAAA

madasacutsnake 12-16-2004 11:35 PM

Spicy makes cookies.

Zaftig 12-16-2004 11:41 PM

With their own unique spice.

Hey Spicy, do you have an ebay ID? heh

Spicy Jack 12-16-2004 11:42 PM

I do. I sell souls.

madasacutsnake 12-16-2004 11:51 PM

I buy them.

madasacutsnake 12-16-2004 11:52 PM

Should I bid?

melissa 12-16-2004 11:53 PM

yes.

Spicy Jack 12-16-2004 11:56 PM

eh, you don't even know if this person has a lean on their soul or what impurities it may have.

i only sell clean or recently repented souls. i also like to soak them in a bit of holy water to get the rest of the residue off.

melissa 12-16-2004 11:57 PM

Your responsibility amazes and impresses me.

Zaftig 12-16-2004 11:57 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by madasacutsnake
Should I bid?
There's no picture. SUCK!

My sister sold me at a yard sale when I was 6 for two bucks. She told the kid to come back when I was 18. He never showed. Shmuck.

melissa 12-16-2004 11:58 PM

And she still got the 2$?

Zaftig 12-17-2004 12:00 AM

Yeah, probably because she was 8 and well, I looked like the bumble bee girl when I was that age and for a long time after. :D I was cute though!!!

madasacutsnake 12-17-2004 12:08 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Spicy Jack
eh, you don't even know if this person has a lean on their soul or what impurities it may have.

i only sell clean or recently repented souls. i also like to soak them in a bit of holy water to get the rest of the residue off.

"Ask seller a question" function. He only has 34 fb. It could be a prank.

I'd also be concerned about how well he packs. It would be disappointing to have a soul damaged in transit.

Coffee 12-17-2004 12:22 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Spicy Jack
eh, you don't even know if this person has a lean on their soul or what impurities it may have.

i only sell clean or recently repented souls. i also like to soak them in a bit of holy water to get the rest of the residue off.


I don't know...I still think it sounds like a good value to pick up that cheep one.
You could use it for your slummin and infidelity soul. Your going out on "that" side of town soul.

trisherina 12-17-2004 02:06 AM

A squarehead soul, definitely for those bohunk adventures. And shipping is schnellen.

Gatsby 12-17-2004 03:26 AM

If I sell free legal service for life on eBay, do you think anyone would pay off my student loans?

Can't guarantee it'd be GOOD legal advise, but it would be heartfelt....

chuckie egg 12-17-2004 12:41 PM

A royal attendant was sacked today after attempting to sell one of the Queen's Christmas puddings on eBay.

Da1&only 12-17-2004 12:47 PM

I fell out of bed this morning.i persons;ly thought it was very funny even tho know one else seen

chuckie egg 12-17-2004 12:53 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Da1&only
I fell out of bed this morning.i persons;ly thought it was very funny even tho know one else seen
HAHA!

RuneT 12-17-2004 01:54 PM


Spicy Jack 12-17-2004 05:38 PM

A Christmas Story for people having a bad day....

When four of Santa's elves got sick, and the trainee elves did not produce the toys as fast as the regular ones, Santa was beginning to feel the pressure of being behind schedule.

Then Mrs. Claus told Santa that her Mom was coming to visit. This stressed Santa even more.

When he went to harness the reindeer, he found that three of them were about to give birth and two had jumped the fence and were out, heaven knows where.

More stress.

Then when he began to load the sleigh one of the boards cracked, and the toy bag fell to the ground and scattered the toys.

So, frustrated, Santa went into the house for a cup of apple cider and a shot of rum. When he went to the cupboard, he discovered that the elves had hidden the liquor, and there was nothing to drink. In his frustration, he accidentally dropped the cider pot, and it broke into hundreds of little pieces all over the kitchen floor.

He went to get the broom and found that mice had eaten the straw end of the broom

Just then the doorbell rang, and irritable Santa trudged to the door. He opened the door, and there was a little angel with a great big Christmas tree.

The angel said, very cheerfully, "Merry Christmas, Santa. Isn't it a lovely day? I have a beautiful tree for you. Where would you like me to stick it?"

And so began the tradition of the little angel on top of the Christmas tree.


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