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Old 03-19-2005, 01:18 PM   #14
Marcus Bales
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Join Date: Dec 2004
Location: In a coign of the cliff between lowland and highland, at the sea-down's edge between windward and lee, walled round with rocks as an inland island, the ghost of a garden fronts the sea.
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The Boring Actual Definition -- Amphiboly: a grammatical structure that allows for two different understandings. For example, in Abbott and Costello’s “Who’s on First” routine the humor is built almost entirely on amphiboly as Abbott’s explanations that “Who’s on first”, meaning a player named “Who” is playing first base, are misinterpreted by Costello as “Who’s on first”, meaning a question about the name of the player who is playing first base. It’s funnier when they do it.

AMPHIBOLY -- From Amphi, meaning dual, and Bolus, meaning a soft mass of chewed food, amphiboly is the early stage of rumination in cows and other cud-chewing animals when the liquids and solids have yet to coalesce into a cohesive mass.

The Ew! Award -- Too much information about something we didn’t want to know anything at all about.

AMPHIBOLY (n) - the practice of drinking sparkling white wine from art nouveau or arts and crafts/mission style vases - from the greek, amphora, and the french, bollinger.

The Alcoholic Haze Award -- There are no nouveau, arts-and-crafts, or mission-style amphorae; all those guys made the far more practical 16.9 oz vessel decorated with naked Polynesians: the Bali-Bolli glass.

AMPHIBOLY (n) - the practice in which a frog (amphibian), becomes very intelligent at the old pastime game of boly.

The Bah! Award -- Everyone knows that frogs are born playing boly, and it doesn’t take any effort at all to get good at it.

AMPHIBOLY -- (n) - The realization that one is able to safely engage in activities both in and out of the water, usually reached developmentally by about the age of four.

The Judges Don’t Get It Award -- There seems to be something significant about this definition, but no points for jokes that whoosh over the judges’ heads.

craig johnston
AMPHIBOLY -- a state of arousal in young south asian women brought about by dancing to bhangra music on saturday afternoons. inordinate lengths are taken to hide this state from parents while flaunting it to potential suitors.

The Almost Sex Comes In Almost Second Award -- It would have won had there been a joke about Boliwood in there along with south asia, so you lucked out, there, Craig.

AMPHIBOLY -- the act of raising your voice when getting a strike in bowling

The Joint Entry Award is jointly awarded to Funky and Zen, for his definition and her example.

Hyakujo's Fox
AMPHIBOLY (n) - the practice of, or desire for, sexual intercourse in breaking waves. Named after a Roman goddess associated with bays and rockpools.

The Coveted Second Place Award -- As usual, sex sells, and the judges bought it this time, too. Woo hoo!

Ms Robbie
AMPHIBOLY -- The practice, in some ancient Middle Eastern cultures, of delivering a child under water, then requiring it to swim to land in order to live. Such cultures usually died out after two generations, causing a subsequent modification of the practice in the form of full-body immersion at a later stage in life. [See baptism.]

The Winner! The judges actually believed this was right for a moment, until wiser heads prevailed and the orgy began.

Take it away, Robbie!
My strength is as the strength of eight --
My heart is nearly pure.

Last edited by Marcus Bales : 03-19-2005 at 01:20 PM.
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