1.If you could be a shade of lipstick, what would your name be? Raw Beef
2.What does yellow taste like? Slippery, gasping for breath, epiphany.
Blue? Electricity, plastic, decompression.
Pink? Cloying, gracefulness, tickling.
3.You are a rigidly honest woman of moderate means who gets involved in chemin de fer at a gambling casino; it's a pitch and toss game. In your excitement, you start to burp repeatedly. One of these burps is an unusually eloquent one, which causes the banker at the table to misunderstand you and think you had called out "Banquo!". Winnings of $50,000 are promptly pushed toward you before you can explain. Will you keep the money? If so, how will you rationalize your action? A rigidly honest woman? Pfffhahahahahaha! Is that like a square circle?
4.Finish this sentence: "Jackdaws love my big (10 inch) sphinx of...." my favorite blues
5.You are challenged to a duel. What is the weapon of your choice? Rock'em Sock'em Robots
6.You've been captured by vicious Japanese salarymen that threaten to kill you, UNLESS, you can sing karaoke well. You have one chance- what song do you sing? Sinatra - From This Moment On
7. If you made them, have you lived up to your New Year's resolutions so far? N/A
8. Tell a story.
Once there was a butterfly who dreamed he was a man who was really a brain in a vat with electrodes stuck in it. The brain thought he was a crewmember aboard the Starship Enterprise, but he was actually in a holodeck simulation of the Enterprise. He then discovered he was a secret agent with a wet towel around his head and that he had to get his ass to Mars. Every night he would hear voices coming from store mannequins, until he discovered he was a mannequin himself. Then one day he awoke to find that he had been living in a computer generated reality ran by machines who were using him like a Duracell. That night he dreamed he was a butterfly.
Atheism presupposes Theism