Sonnet#1 (Completed) - ZEFRANK.COM

lapietra · 10-19-2002, 08:00 PM

Not sure if this will take too much work but if anyone's interested it would be fun to see what we come up with -
A sonnet (for anyone in this mostly erudite crowd who doesn't already know - and for those that do, I know there are other types of sonnets but I thought I'd stick with the English form) is a type of verse that consists of 14 lines in iambic pentameter, in this case, with a rhyme scheme of ABAB CDCD EFEF GG (or sometimes ABBA CDDC EFFE GG - with the last two lines usually being a comment on the previous 12). Shakespeare wrote a whole bunch of them, as did many other great writers & poets.
Okay, this sounds confusing, but it really isn't! "Iambic pentameter" just means that each line has 10 syllables in it, usually with the accent on every other beat (i.e., ba-bum, ba-bum, ba-bum, ba-bum, ba-bum), but even Shakespeare broke that rule often, and sometimes included 11 or (more rarely) 12 beats in a line. There's more, but it mostly applies to his plays, not to the sonnets.
Here's one of my favorite Shakespeare sonnets as an example - I've labeled the lines as to their rhyme scheme:

A: When in disgrace with Fortune and men's *eyes*
B: I all alone beweep my outcast *state* ,
A: And trouble deaf heaven with my bootless *cries* ,
B: And look upon myself and curse my *fate* ,

C: Wishing me like to one more rich in *hope* ,
D: Featur'd like him, like him with friends *possess'd* ,
C: Desiring this man's art, and that man's *scope* ,
D: With what I most enjoy contented *least* ;

E: Yet in these thoughts myself almost *despising* ,
F: Haply I think on thee, and then my *state*
E: (Like to the lark at break of day *arising*
F: From sullen earth) sings hymns at heaven's *gate* ,

G: For thy sweet love rememb'red such wealth *brings* ,
G: That then I scorn to change my state with *kings* .

As I mentioned happens sometimes, the third & ninth lines have 11 syllables in them, but you can still say the lines so they fit the rhythm (i.e., ba-bada, ba-bum, ba-bum, ba-bum, ba-bum, and ba-bum, ba-bum, ba-bum, ba-bum, ba-baah-bum) - that's the key. Also, words like "beloved", "beauteous", "vanished", "cancelled" etc., can be stretched out or shortened to fit the rhythm, i.e. "belov'd" or "belov-ed", "beau-teous" or "beau-te-ous". See?
BTW - here's a great site that has lots of sonnets to read - and you can write and submit your own, too!

http://www.sonnets.org/

Okay, I'll start - one line at a time, unless you really, *really* feel the need to continue:
**********************************************
In secret, I adore the sensuous line

beckstra · 10-19-2002, 08:12 PM

That clefts the chin of my salacious beau

lapietra · 10-19-2002, 08:31 PM

It renders me absolutely supine

beckstra · 10-20-2002, 11:59 AM

Sends shivers down my spine from head to toe

cosmo949 · 10-21-2002, 02:17 AM

Perhaps my musings are not a mystery

Viki · 10-21-2002, 09:19 PM

To those who understand a bleeding heart

beckstra · 10-21-2002, 11:43 PM

I often wonder if this god sees me

lapietra · 10-22-2002, 02:15 AM

Or if I play a mediocre part

dinzdale · 10-22-2002, 01:05 PM

For if my life and loves appear as nought

Deviate · 10-22-2002, 05:18 PM

Please pay attention to the lines I give

dinzdale · 10-22-2002, 06:02 PM

as in my wounded heart this life has taught

beckstra · 10-22-2002, 06:32 PM

Me moreso than ever to really live

Deviate · 10-22-2002, 08:10 PM

So my secret shall only find true life

lapietra · 10-22-2002, 11:11 PM

When I become more than just his office wife!

lapietra · 10-22-2002, 11:12 PM

That was fun!!!!!!!! Okay - someone start a new one!

10-22-2002, 11:12 PM	#15
lapietra half baked Join Date: Sep 2002 Location: just ducky Posts: 12,078	Wheeeeeeee!!!!!!! That was fun!!!!!!!! Okay - someone start a new one! __________________ “As long as the world is turning and spinning, we're gonna be dizzy and we're gonna make mistakes.” ~ Mel Brooks

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10-19-2002, 08:00 PM	#1
lapietra half baked Join Date: Sep 2002 Location: just ducky Posts: 12,078	Anybody up for a sonnet? (One line at a time suggested) Not sure if this will take too much work but if anyone's interested it would be fun to see what we come up with - A sonnet (for anyone in this mostly erudite crowd who doesn't already know - and for those that do, I know there are other types of sonnets but I thought I'd stick with the English form) is a type of verse that consists of 14 lines in iambic pentameter, in this case, with a rhyme scheme of ABAB CDCD EFEF GG (or sometimes ABBA CDDC EFFE GG - with the last two lines usually being a comment on the previous 12). Shakespeare wrote a whole bunch of them, as did many other great writers & poets. Okay, this sounds confusing, but it really isn't! "Iambic pentameter" just means that each line has 10 syllables in it, usually with the accent on every other beat (i.e., ba-bum, ba-bum, ba-bum, ba-bum, ba-bum), but even Shakespeare broke that rule often, and sometimes included 11 or (more rarely) 12 beats in a line. There's more, but it mostly applies to his plays, not to the sonnets. Here's one of my favorite Shakespeare sonnets as an example - I've labeled the lines as to their rhyme scheme: A: When in disgrace with Fortune and men's eyes B: I all alone beweep my outcast state , A: And trouble deaf heaven with my bootless cries , B: And look upon myself and curse my fate , C: Wishing me like to one more rich in hope , D: Featur'd like him, like him with friends possess'd , C: Desiring this man's art, and that man's scope , D: With what I most enjoy contented least ; E: Yet in these thoughts myself almost despising , F: Haply I think on thee, and then my state E: (Like to the lark at break of day arising F: From sullen earth) sings hymns at heaven's gate , G: For thy sweet love rememb'red such wealth brings , G: That then I scorn to change my state with kings . As I mentioned happens sometimes, the third & ninth lines have 11 syllables in them, but you can still say the lines so they fit the rhythm (i.e., ba-bada, ba-bum, ba-bum, ba-bum, ba-bum, and ba-bum, ba-bum, ba-bum, ba-bum, ba-baah-bum) - that's the key. Also, words like "beloved", "beauteous", "vanished", "cancelled" etc., can be stretched out or shortened to fit the rhythm, i.e. "belov'd" or "belov-ed", "beau-teous" or "beau-te-ous". See? BTW - here's a great site that has lots of sonnets to read - and you can write and submit your own, too! http://www.sonnets.org/ Okay, I'll start - one line at a time, unless you really, really feel the need to continue: ********************************************** In secret, I adore the sensuous line Last edited by lapietra : 10-19-2002 at 08:10 PM.

10-19-2002, 08:12 PM	#2
beckstra one classy broad Join Date: Sep 2002 Location: The Cornhusker State Posts: 1,229	That clefts the chin of my salacious beau

10-19-2002, 08:31 PM	#3
lapietra half baked Join Date: Sep 2002 Location: just ducky Posts: 12,078	It renders me absolutely supine

10-20-2002, 11:59 AM	#4
beckstra one classy broad Join Date: Sep 2002 Location: The Cornhusker State Posts: 1,229	Sends shivers down my spine from head to toe

10-21-2002, 02:17 AM	#5
cosmo949 caesura Join Date: Sep 2002 Posts: 516	Perhaps my musings are not a mystery

10-21-2002, 09:19 PM	#6
Viki Registered User Join Date: Oct 2002 Location: New Jersey Posts: 3	To those who understand a bleeding heart

10-21-2002, 11:43 PM	#7
beckstra one classy broad Join Date: Sep 2002 Location: The Cornhusker State Posts: 1,229	I often wonder if this god sees me

10-22-2002, 02:15 AM	#8
lapietra half baked Join Date: Sep 2002 Location: just ducky Posts: 12,078	Or if I play a mediocre part

10-22-2002, 01:05 PM	#9
dinzdale King of the špatnýs Join Date: Oct 2002 Location: was that dog Posts: 9,411	For if my life and loves appear as nought

10-22-2002, 05:18 PM	#10
Deviate Butt-F***ing the World Join Date: Sep 2002 Location: the other side of normal Posts: 5,863	Please pay attention to the lines I give

10-22-2002, 06:02 PM	#11
dinzdale King of the špatnýs Join Date: Oct 2002 Location: was that dog Posts: 9,411	as in my wounded heart this life has taught

10-22-2002, 06:32 PM	#12
beckstra one classy broad Join Date: Sep 2002 Location: The Cornhusker State Posts: 1,229	Me moreso than ever to really live

10-22-2002, 08:10 PM	#13
Deviate Butt-F***ing the World Join Date: Sep 2002 Location: the other side of normal Posts: 5,863	So my secret shall only find true life

10-22-2002, 11:11 PM	#14
lapietra half baked Join Date: Sep 2002 Location: just ducky Posts: 12,078	When I become more than just his office wife!