Fabuloso Friday 2/15 OR MORE

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Rude Words

(Draft Script)


Ze: Greetings fellow Sports Racers! The Earth Sandwich may be complete...


Ze: But that’s not enough! We’re still too darn far apart!

MEDIUM CLOSE [Grandiose unveiling.]

Ze: In the spirit of Intercontinental Sports Racer Unification, let me present...

(Sings. Cheerful little tune.)

Ze: Learn a Rude Word today. With Ze!

EXTREME CU [Joyful.]

Ze: In foreign!

MEDIUM [Begins to speak, but checks his watch...]

Ze: Scheiße, this lil' duckie seems to have run out of time...

[Relieved sigh.]

(I've acted/timed this, it's just about fifteen seconds long. :D CeruleanNinja)

Finnish Alternative

MEDIUM [Before continuing, Ze checks his watch. Smirks.]

Ze: Voi vittujen kevät ja kyrpien takatalvi! (Finnish for “life could be better” as suggested by Gelbi)

(C'mon, can anyone think of other punchlines, based on the suggestions within the Discussion? Also, could someone record a .wav on how to pronounce the Finnish phrase properly, for reference? :D CeruleanNinja 15:11, 18 June 2006 (PDT))

Clevur Woidz

[Ze in repose.]


Ze: Here's some advice, Sports Racers...


Ze: Learn a new word each day, so that, in time you can communicate by saying things like:...


[3/4 face at frame left]

Ze: I wish I could defenestrate this exsufflicate script, penned entirely by anonymuncles, depicting me as a balatron.

[3/4 face at frame right]

Ze: Assholes!

'Alternative 2:'

Ze: [whispers] Look them up, I dare ya.

'Alternative 3:'


Ze: ...And continue being a cosmokrator. (ruler of the world)

Make up your own! CeruleanNinja 13:24, 16 June 2006 (PDT)

Rude Clevur Woidz

(This is a cousin-version to ‘Punctuation Substitution’)

[Ze is cranky at someone off-screen. He leans into shot conspirationally.]


Ze: Here's some advice!


Ze: Expand your vocabulary by gathering rare or antiquated words that mean rude things. So that, you can vent at irritating narks by saying things like...

CLOSE SHOT [Sweet as pie.]

Ze: Wow, a vaniloquent sciolist like yourself should definitely run for senate.

EXTREME CU [Secretly sarcastic.]

Ze: And, perhaps you too will be engaging in sciamachy with the rest of the smatchets. [Image of George Dubya and his pals]


Ze: Assholes! ("assholes" in Latin?)

CeruleanNinja 13:23, 17 June 2006 (PDT)

Play Chess with Ze

(requires a chessboard)

A set-up chessboard is set between Ze and the camera. Ze is playing white.

Ze: Let's play a game of chess!

Ze moves a white pawn forward.

Ze: Your move!

Ze smiles expectantly at the camera for the remaining time.

Kazz 14:40, 17 June 2006 (PDT)

  • Lol, simple but cute. :) CeruleanNinja 15:28, 18 June 2006 (PDT)

Play Chess with Ze... Reprise

(This could be the other half of a sandwich?...)

Ze: S-s-s-something from the meta-email!


Ze: PinkGoosie writes: 'Chess sucks, Ze. We should totally play Snakes & Ladders or Crosses & Naughts, instead.'

[Ze casts a disappointed look at the camera, and shakes his head in dismay.]

CeruleanNinja 15:59, 17 June 2006 (PDT)

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